You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Randomize
