have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Randomize
