Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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