problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
