Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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