so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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