cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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