I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize
