My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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