Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
