Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
