well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I am midnight drunk by noon
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
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