Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
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