if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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