Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
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I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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