just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize
