this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
