hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
