I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
he puts the penis in happiness.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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