I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Rumble strips road head = magical
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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