This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
We left the knife in your bed.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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