Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
