everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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