..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
pray to the hookup gods
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
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