Just fell off a train. Bad.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
We're too hungover to prance.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
