Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize