You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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