I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
