The maid of honor just puked.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize