She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
