we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
