Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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