I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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