Whod you bang
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
