She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
