btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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