So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
