that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
