the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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