Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
