high people should be assigned attendants
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Randomize
