So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
