Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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