He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize