Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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