it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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