plz talk dirty to me
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize