Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
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She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
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I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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