I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize
