I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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